08.

Alright since I have nothing to do until 9, I will blog about 08. I didn't want to blog about 08 since there are some things I rather not recall, but, I will still summarize 08 (not like anyone is reading yes???)

This year, I started uni. Uni wasn't a huge change, it wasn't interesting too. At first, I was all excited but bleh its still somehow not very different to highschool. Really!! I got to know HEAPS of people but I gain some close friendship, not acquaintance, but true friendship, like highschool where I only had (and still have) the bunch of people I hang around. It's funny, if I bump into someone from my yr level, I will immediately recognise that he/she is in my yr level and in the buseco faculty but I wouldn't know their name or wouldn't even know them personally (if that makes sense). Lecture hall is really the place to see these familiar faces over and over again. But, u don't get the chance to personally do the whole introduction, hi how r u thing and get to know them until u have the same tute classes together.

My achievements had some ups and downs. First semester, I was cruising. My grades were unbelievable. Exams were easy as, Second semester, it was the opposite, my grades dropped horrendously(okay maybe not), but I wasn't doing my best. Last minute work, not showing up to tuts and lectures and late nights studying for exams. I was struggling in every corner. Exams suddenly turned hard for me. It wasn't good enough to get me off the line. I started to self-doubt myself, whether I'm capable, whether this course is what I wanted. I could have done better, I could have put more effort but my ego from first semester took over. There was definitely a stressful period where I broke down and cried. It was definitely a depressing period for me.

My walk with God was another thing. First semester, I felt lost, I really felt lost. I guess life was too good that I seem to let myself go. There was nothing I had to worry about. It felt like I didn't need God (I know a sad thing to say). I wasn't listening, paying attention to God. Church seems like a ritual to me and I was house searching for a LG that I can connect with but none of them seem right.

But, come second semester, I joined OCF. It was quite intimidating actually. The first time, I walked into a prayer meeting with my brother. Gosh... I mean can't blame me, first timer for feeling intimidated. But as they were praying, weird enough, the atmosphere was all too familiar to me, I know this feeling, this feeling when u sense something strong in the midst. Regardless not knowing any of these people, I actually felt safe and secure. OCF has brought me to a higher level, OCF was a place that I instanly felt connected. I started going every week with my brother. My brother made everything feel less intimidating. I started joining the BS (Bible study) with my group Smoky Sinai where I learn ALOT. I even helped out with E-night and Thanksgiving night.

I am in awe at these OCFers. These people have so much faith, and so much love for God. At first, I wasn't too keen on joining OCF because to me it's just a student organisation. I wanted to connect with a group that can help me to grow, I was looking for something with connection to a CHURCH but as I said, I was wrong enough. I couldn't find a place that I feel comfortable until OCF. OCFers are unbelivably dedicated to God, the way they pray, express, worship God open my eyes to see how much I have been missing out on. I was spending more quiet time with God. I fasted for the very first time!!! I sponsored a child too!!! I prayed to God frequently. The thing I find amazing is the strong bond between all OCFers and how they can just share and talk about life towards each other. I still find it hard to open up (even to my close friends and family) about life, my issues, my problems etc... I hope to be able to open up my feelings soon.

I got my first job. There are ups and downs about the job. But, this experience is one of value to me. I certainly got "richer" and I know a great knowledge about German and Swiss cakes, breads and buns. Somehow, this experience made me tougher as a person and my confidence grew. I was able to do problem solving and I learn to be quick thinking. It was definitely an experience.

Family, dad came to live with us in the second half of the yr which was a thrill to me. After a yr living in M'sia, I was grateful to have dad living here again. I remember how I cried the day dad left. Dad immediately got a job at Taylors which was a blessing to the family. My brothers are still the same. We spent heaps more time together as a family. We had more trips once dad got here. The family was more discipline, in terms of my brothers are more well behave with dad here. Mum cried less, oh... those days were hell but with dad here at least mum got some closure.

Hmm what else.. love life?? I GOT A BOYFRIEND. LOL. U're waiting for me to say that aren't u?? LOL. No... It's still the same as usual. But, one day... one day... u wait!!! I'm still catching up with my girlfriends and having lots of fun together.

Okay... 08 was not too bad. I definitely grown ALOT. There are certainty some "what if" moments and "oh well'' moments, disappointment and regrets. But, I think I lived it to my best potential. I took every opportunity I could possibly get. 08 was a success, given some of my failure, it still is a success!!!!!!